Angeline Toh
(*This sharing was transcribed from a verbal transcript of Angeline’s spoken thoughts.)
This course has taught me to look at myself better and manage myself in how I communicate with others.
1) What brought you to the NLP course?
I observed Seok and Ian during a one-day programme for my company's management team and found how they handled disagreements and objections very refreshing. They mentioned that they practise NLP, and I was intrigued enough to look into it. I found an upcoming NLP practitioner course at Mind Transformations and went for it.
2) What helped you in this course? What were some of your bigger takeaways?
I signed up wanting to be a better communicator and influence people. It has become clear to me that it is really about handling yourself to get a better response from others because you cannot, not influence them.
I went in wanting to communicate better with others, and I emerged learning how to communicate better with myself.
The situations we work on in class are real. It's not "role-playing". Barney asked us to choose situations that are meaningful and impactful to work on. It's serious stuff.
At first, I found it hard to learn the coaching-style mindset and skills. I don't even consider myself an amateur in this. But since I'll use it for performance reviews with my team, to guide my daughter and advise my friends, I decided to put in the work.
I also had peer support. Michelle and Peilin are wonderful classmates who helped me stay the course. I'm very grateful to them.
With time, I started getting good feedback from classmates. I always asked my practice partners what I could do to improve. I want to get better.
One of the things I'm continuing to work on is phrasing things positively. It makes every difference in how you think about the "thing" in question. I want to learn how to help people see the glimmer of possibility in life.
Every one of the trainers and facilitators at the NLP course, whether it's Barney or the members of the MT team, has a measured countenance. Slowing down helps me process information and respond rather than react. To do that, I'm focusing on managing my state even when people press me for a quick answer.
My big takeaway from the course is: You have everything that you need to take the next step.
After the NLP training, I created an outline for a work requirement that my peers could reference. When I reviewed the document afterwards, I discovered I had written it using conversational frames!
When I reflected on all the tools the course has given us, I discovered that not a single one involved changing other people. The "coach" helps you draw out the answers from within, make connections and illuminate things in you. So YOU can make the change.
"What's stopping you?" is one of the most powerful questions I learned.
This question made me realise that eventually, everything boils down to how I manage myself to deal with challenges.
I worked with someone in my group twice—once in Module One and again on the last day. The types of answers that she gave were different—she has caught on to how to find the answers within herself. I was very proud of the change in my classmate!
I love the support system. It helps us keep practising what we have learned after the course. The post-course review session with Barney and the opportunity to participate in refreshers are valuable.
The experiential exercises in class gave me new insights. After a particular exercise, I realised that when I talk to people, I blame them when they don't understand. But it's my fault that they didn't get it! The responsibility is on the communicator to make sure that they are understood.
It is in my power to manage myself and communicate with the other person, which determines whether they understand me.
3) What might you say to someone considering learning NLP?
If someone says to me that they're considering taking an NLP course, I'd highlight that this training with Mind Transformations is not just a communication or influencing course. Be prepared to adjust your mindset.
I'm so awed by the MT team for having devoted themselves to a practice like this.
I've signed on to the Master Practitioner course, with trepidation. I am looking forward to getting to know myself better.
